A.J. (sneaky_in_red) wrote in passion_perfect,

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Can't Go Back Now 12/??

Title: Can't Go Back Now
Pairing: Emily/JJ
Rating: back to PG-14ish for the language
Disclaimer: Umm... I think I've said that I don't own them. Well, but let me say it again: I don't own any of them!
Archiving: I'll be happy if you think this is worth archiving at all. LOL.
Author's note: If you don't like it, blame my muse! I told her it wasn't good enough. She wouldn't listen (thanks to that stupid sweet coffee I drank this morning!)
Dedication: For D, I love you! *grins sheepishly*

I present to you....


Chapter 12

They found absolutely nothing new in the crime scenes, except maybe some drizzles. Morgan was on the phone, either with Hotch or Reid. Emily squatted near the place where the locals found the fourth victim. She stared absentmindedly at the ground. Their last victim had been an eleven-year-old girl. She was kidnapped after her gym practice. She had been missing for four days before her body was found.

“Right, okay,” Morgan said, ended his conversation. “Hey Prentiss, Hotch wanted us to get back.”

Emily looked up. “Morgan, if you were a child and you knew that children have been missing, what would you do?” She asked. Morgan raised his eyebrows and Emily continued, “If I were a child, and my mother told me that there is some bad guys taking kids away, I would be scared like hell to be alone at any time.”

“I got your point,” Morgan said. “And yet, Carla Stuarts was alone the day of the abduction. That means...”

“It must be someone she knew, Morgan. What else would make an eleven-year-old separate herself from her gang if it wasn’t for someone she knew? And of course that ‘someone’ is an adult. Children her age know that it’s better to stick with larger group unless you’re with an adult.” Emily almost jumped.

Morgan nodded. Then something crossed his mind. “Prentiss, wait,” he stopped the over excited Emily. “We checked all their backgrounds... There is no way these kids knew the same person. They didn’t know each other, they didn’t go to the same school, different religions, different everything.” He said.

The brunette frowned. She raised her eyebrows. “Then maybe we didn’t dig deep enough into their backgrounds,” she said icily. She didn’t know why it was so easy for her to be angry these days. Oh, right, she said in her head, thanks to Agent Jareau. She grabbed her phone and shot at Garcia before the computer tech could say a word. “Garcia I need you to look again into the victims’ backgrounds. I want to know everything: What they did at the weekends, where they went, get anything you can get me, even part-time nannies and pediatricians. Anything!” She ended the call and looked at Morgan, challenging the dark profiler to say something.

The muscular man was startled. At first he thought that Emily had finally come back to her old self with everything she said earlier. But he changed his mind. Now he was sure that the woman was at the point of breaking down, and she didn’t even realize it. He shook his head as Emily strutted to the vehicle. I really need to talk to Hotch about this.

And Morgan didn’t say a word on their way back to the hotel.


Everyone left the station not long after Emily and Morgan left. JJ kept silent on the way back to the hotel. She didn’t listen to Reid who couldn’t stop talking about some kinds of statistics and only nodded whenever the young genius addressed her.

Emily puzzled her. The brunette had been so angry at her before. She had been so disappointed and broken. And now, the woman acted as if nothing had happened between them. No, she thought bitterly, she acted like she didn’t even know me. JJ felt like her heart was being crunched by a giant hand. She didn’t understand why. Her friendship with Emily came as an easy answer to the question. But JJ was dissatisfied with the answer. There’s something else that would explain her heartache perfectly, something that had kept the blonde from answering Will’s call for the past twenty-four hours.


“Prentiss, we need to talk.” Morgan confronted the woman soon as they reached the hotel. He had been thinking and he thought maybe it would be for the best if he talked to Emily first rather than go straight to their unit chief behind her back.

Emily unbuckled her seat-belt but she didn’t get off the car. She waited. She was familiar with Morgan’s serious tone and she knew what she was not going to like whatever the man was going to say.

“I know this is none of my business, but I really think that you need to step away from this case,” the man said, a little too harsh than he had intended. “You’re not your usual self and you know it. You can’t fool me, Prentiss.”

“And what are you going to do about it? Tell Hotch about it?” Emily shot back. “Go ahead then. Maybe it is what you guys wanted, not having me around.”

“Emily, it isn’t what...” Morgan wasn’t given a chance to finish his words. Emily kept talking as if she didn’t listen.

“You know, I’m tired of always being the ‘new girl’ in the team. First Reid treated me like a roach, then Hotch questioned my loyalty, then JJ betrayed my friendship – and my feelings, and now you!” Emily pointed her finger at Morgan. “You don’t even try to support me! And no, I don’t want to listen!” The woman slammed the door shut with a loud noise and she walked as fast as her feet allowed her to the hotel.

Morgan followed her. “Prentiss, wait!” He called. He wanted to smack himself for being so insensitive with his words. When the woman didn’t stop, he tried to grab her arm.

Emily felt her left arm being pulled by Morgan and she turned to face the man. She slapped him hard. “Fuck you, Morgan!” And she ran away, leaving the dark profiler standing in the middle of the parking lot. Emily was only two feet away from her room when she suddenly ran into JJ, who looked so puzzled to see her. “And fuck you, too!” Emily growled as she walked past the blonde.

JJ had had enough with everything Emily had put her through. She followed Emily to her room and closed the door audibly. “What the hell was that for?” She asked with a raised voice.

The brunette glared angrily at JJ. She didn’t expect her to follow. “That, Agent Jareau, was for everything you did to me!” She answered. “What the hell are you doing here, in my room? Aren’t you afraid that I, the freaky gay, will do something bad to you?” Emily snapped, masking her fear and pain with anger.

The younger woman blushed as Emily mentioned herself as being gay. “Because I’ve had enough of your bullshit,” JJ spat. “And stop calling me Agent Jareau! If you have a problem with me, say it to my face! I’m tired of your pointless anger and self destruction!”

“My anger is none of your business. And it’s my own self destruction we’re talking about, so there’s no need to worry on your part there!” The brunette said, no longer willing to hold back. “And it’s none of your business if I want to call you Agent Jareau.”

“Well, it bothers me!” replied JJ. She couldn’t help but staring at Emily’s lips. “You kissed me,” she said, blushing as the words came out. “And you left me without giving me a chance to say anything.”

Emily snorted. “I did give you a chance! I did give you a lot of chances! I gave you the chance of telling me about your relationship with that man, I gave you the chance to tell me about your pregnancy, I gave you the chance to tell me that you’re going to marry him,” she shouted. Then she added so softly that JJ barely heard it, “And I even gave you the chance to tell me that you are not disgusted with me.”

JJ felt a sharp pierce in her heart when she heard the last sentence. “Emily,” she took a step forward. “I am not disgusted with you.”

“But you don’t want to have anything to do with me, either,” Emily concluded. “I understand. You don’t have to worry about it. I’m resigning after the case. You don’t have to see me anymore. Now will you please leave my room?”

JJ took another step towards Emily. “I didn’t say I don’t want to see you anymore. You are my friend,” she stated.

Just your friend, Emily thought dejectedly, I can’t live with that. Tears streamed down her face openly now. “Jennifer, please leave my room,” the brunette pleaded.

The press liaison wrapped Emily in her arms. She felt her friend’s body shivered as they touched. “I never wanted to hurt you, Emily. I’m so sorry,” she whispered. Her voice cracked. They stood motionless for a few seconds before JJ let go of her hug and stepped back. She walked to the door and reached for the handle. She stopped, turned back and saw Emily right in the eyes. “And I don’t think I’m sorry we kissed.” With that last remark, JJ left the room.

Emily didn’t move. She didn’t really understand what JJ meant, but she was perfectly sure it was some kind of softened rejections. She cried.


“Never kiss a friend. If you have deeper feelings, do not reveal them. You might lose your friendship forever...”



a/n: Well? What do you think? *Red sits nervously on the floor, eating cookies, waiting for comments*
Tags: criminal minds

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